How many times in our life.. we refrain ourselves from the eternal joy of life just because we feel that the people around us would not really understand or would like us to experience that..!!

How man times you wanted to do something that you had always wanted to do but you didn't coz you had to look after the needs of your family members

How many times you wanted to fall in love with this amazing guy but you couldn't let urslf loose control cos u know that your family wont accept your falling for a guy ..!!

How many times you wanted to fight against the wrong and you don't cos your fight for the right would effect your family ..

Many of us come across situations in our life where we want to satisfy our needs ... our Id comes into action an demands instant gratification but our superego.. every individuals moral police takes over and abstains the Id to satisfy himself..!! 

But for what ..??? Why do we need to curb our desires or wants for others..when we know that satisfying our inner wants isn't harmful...it makes you a better person..It makes you happy,ecstatic and content.Then why do we first look at our society,our spouse,our parents,our children,grandchildren before we do anything which brings us pure joy..!!!

Why don't we give ourselves the right to enjoy and relish and pamper our own self with the attention,fun and luxuries we would want 2 indulge in.... Why a mother before going for a head massage from a masseur thinks twice about whether she should spend the money getting herself a massage or buy her son a harry potter DVD..!!! I get that we get happiness when our near ones are happy but what about our own happiness?? What about our own wishes?I dont ask you to get selfish self centered and egoist but is it right that you spend your whole life doing things for others,serving others,concerned about their welfare and when you need support no one looks back to you..no one comes forward to hold you when you are falling no one comes stand by your side and say don't worry i am here...!!!

Then is it right to keep neglecting ours elf n stick to "others before self" and at the end have nothing with you ..not even a person you could have been with who had loved you with all his heart just cos it would have been against your morality ,..but did the ultimate reciprocity morality take place in d first place....??

Love yourself before you love others.. treat yourself right before treat others right..do good to yourself before you go out to do good to others.. !!

                                                   You Are All Of This To Me

( This poem had been dedicated to a very close friend,around five years back. Every time I read it,it feels that you are still around.Miss you loads..may your soul rest in peace)

You’re the thought that starts each morning,

the conclusion to each day.

You are in all that I do,

and everything I say.

You’re the smile on my face,

the twinkle in my eye.

The warmth inside my heart,

the fullness in my life.

You’re the hand that’s laced in mine,

and  the coat upon my back.

My friend,my love,

my shoulder to lean on.

You are my silly , mature ,caring,

thoghtful,bright and honest buddy.

The one who holds me tightly,

when I need to cry.

You are all I’ve wanted,

you are all I need.

You are I’ve dreamed of,

you are all of this to me.

I CARE

 I had a friend,

with whom conversations had no end.

We could chat our heart out..

we were there for each other without a doubt.

promised to god that we wont go apart

will always be one’s life’s part

Had spent the days together,laughing and having fun.

but we grew up,our lifes now apart 

the days passed by and weeks rush on

and before I knew ,a year was gone.

I would always say ,that “tommorrow i shall call Jim”

to let him know that I think of him

but tommorrow comes n tommorrow goes 

n the distance between us grows n grows..

and then one fine day comes a call, 

which says “Jim has left us all”

trembling the whole world,

torn apart ,

as my life took another fall.

deep in the realms of sadness and the ocean of fear i swam apart

gulping the reality that this is what I deserved,

at the end of the day ..

m alone at the bay..

staring at the sky n wondering why

I never called to say 

that, friend I care...

is this the cost I have to pay??

I want you to know that i had always cared

worried and tensed weneva u failed..

loved the every moment spent with you

the peace that was there being with you.

I still think of you when am low..

hoping you’ll call as you always used to do.

but you arent there,neither those late night fone calls

neither those gushes and blushes..

but  here in my heart ,u ‘ll always stay,

flashes of time spent playing with a clay.

you must be there up  in the sky

looking down as a spy

I ll look up and have just one thing to say,

I had always cared ..

worried and tensed whenever you failed.